Lightening the Load

When life starts to feel heavy, it’s usually a sign that I’m carrying more than I need to. Not physically, but emotionally. Old hurts, past mistakes, regrets, and even stories I tell myself about who I “should” be can quietly pile up until I feel like I’m walking uphill with a weighted backpack.

The truth is, we all carry baggage. Some of it we’ve chosen to pack, and some was placed on us without our permission. Either way, holding on to what no longer serves us only slows us down. The question becomes: What do I need to let go of in order to move forward?

Letting go isn’t always easy—sometimes it feels downright impossible. We tell ourselves that holding on keeps us safe, reminds us of who we are, or protects us from being hurt again. But in reality, carrying baggage from the past only keeps us stuck in a place we’ve already outgrown.

So, how do we begin to unpack and leave it behind for good?

Examples of Emotional Baggage We Carry

1. The weight of regret
   Maybe it’s a job we didn’t take, words we wish we hadn’t said, or opportunities we let slip by. Regret can sneak into our thoughts at quiet moments and whisper, “If only…” But regret doesn’t change the past—it only drains our present.
2. The heaviness of old wounds
   Past betrayals, heartbreaks, or childhood pain can linger long after the event itself. A familiar smell, a song, or a phrase can bring the memory rushing back. When we carry these wounds without healing, they shape how we show up in relationships and how much we trust ourselves and others.
3. The burden of limiting beliefs
   Sometimes the baggage isn’t even ours. It’s the voice of a parent, teacher, or society telling us who we “should” be. “You’re not good enough.” “Don’t take risks.” “Play it safe.” These beliefs can weigh us down just as heavily as heartbreak or regret.

Tips to Leave the Baggage Behind

1. Name what you’re carrying
   The first step is awareness. Ask yourself: What feels heavy right now? Sometimes writing it down helps. Seeing it on paper makes it clear whether you’re carrying guilt, fear, anger, or something else entirely.
2. Challenge the story
   Baggage often comes wrapped in a story we’ve been telling ourselves. For example, “I failed once, so I’ll fail again.” Ask yourself: Is this absolutely true? Most often, the answer is no.
3. Practice forgiveness—especially for yourself
   Forgiveness isn’t about excusing what happened; it’s about freeing yourself from being bound to it. Self-forgiveness is especially powerful. You did the best you could with what you knew at the time.
4. Create a ritual of release
   Symbolic acts help us let go. You might write down what you want to release and burn the paper. You might breathe deeply and imagine exhaling the weight with each breath. Or you could literally pack an old suitcase with slips of paper that represent your baggage, then close it and set it aside.
5. Fill the empty space with something new
   Letting go isn’t just about release—it’s also about inviting in what you want instead. Replace regret with gratitude, anger with compassion, or fear with curiosity. Nature abhors a vacuum, so when you put down your baggage, choose what you’d like to carry forward instead.

The Wise Woman says . . .

Letting go of baggage doesn’t mean forgetting your past. It means honoring it for the lessons it taught you and choosing not to be defined by it. You are not your mistakes. You are not your heartbreaks. You are not the words that were once spoken over you.You are stronger, wiser, and freer because of what you’ve lived through—but you don’t need to carry it all with you anymore.

So, the next time life feels heavy, pause and ask yourself: What am I carrying that no longer belongs with me? Then, take a deep breath, set it down, and step forward lighter.